Shepard of Bethleham Guides "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington" No Fencing Required!

William Brown, a ferry-boat operator from Bethlehem, West Virginia claims he has the answer to get the sheep into Washington. He says, "Old George gave me the idea. Cross the Delaware at night. In boats. Undercover of darkness. That's how our country started! We can do it again! Take them "Congress Bitch Boys" by surprise!  William claims, "Once Congress sees the sheep! Problem solved! Our Fearless Leaders will chase sheep up and down the streets of Washington! For days! Meanwhile! "We the people" moves right in! Take "Our Country" Back! Problem Solved! No fencing required"!

Dear William,

Please throw a dollar across the Delaware for us!  Might as well throw it in the river! Not worth much anymore! Our Fearless Leaders erased their thirty year spending spree at the expense of  "We the people"!  Your proposal has merit. I will submit it to headquarters. William Brown you are "We the people"!

Codename: Bethlehem 067.

Skeetron.

How Many "Congress Bitch Boys" Does It Take To Screw In A Light Bulb?

Congress claims, "That's Impossible! One trillion dollars! Maybe!  What's another trillion or two! We have already spent  the future of  America! For the next millenium". Congress claims, "Tell  America! Congress can screw in a light bulb for one trillion! Claim a budget of two trillion. Claim we reduced the national debt by one trillion! We will be heroes"! "Congress Bitch Boys" vote yea!

Senate says, "Were not sure! Might be possible. What's in it for us"? 

Dear Fearless Leaders,

One trillion + one trillion + one trillion + .................................... one trillion = Our Children's Future = The end of this Great Country! = The end of  "We  the people"! = World War III =  The end of plant earth! = God's Wraith!

Dear Fearless Leaders,

Please hire any child to screw in the light bulb for a nickel!

Skeetron.

"Lady Gumbo" Claims! Congress Is Sleeping!

"Lady Gumbo" of Baton Rouge claims Congress sleeps on the job! She claims her "Firecracker Gumbo" will keep Congress and Senate awake! We down here eat roadkill! Them there leaders of ours drink Champaign! Eat the American pie! We pay for it! She's tired of it! She claims no Congressman or Senator  can sleep after eating her gumbo! She says, "Them sissy boys up there! They fall asleep! They'll shit themselves"!  "Lady Gumbo" claims the quick solution to solving the problems of America is her "Firecracker Gumbo" and  locked toilets in Washington!

Dear Lady Gumbo,

"Firecracker Gumbo"! Get her done! "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington" would like to place an order for four thousand gallons of "Firecracker Gumbo" for deliver to Washington. We will be in contact soon. "Lady Gumbo" you are "We the people"!

Codename: Louisiana 128.

Skeetron.

Congress Mandates! Give Sheep Drugs and Game!

Congress and Senate conspires with drug companies and medicine to subdue sheep into submission. Congress states, "Sheep on narcotics are easy prey! Give them heroin! Give them Oxycontin! Give them crack and cocaine! Have our sheep frolic "In Game" as we plunder what's their's! Give them "Pills and Powders! Give them "Bread and Game! Tell them they are the chosen ones! Then take all that  is their's! Command them! Leap! To the pits of despair! Who cares!  We are the Caesars of modern-day affairs".

Dear Drug Dealers,

Timber!

Skeetron.

Alert! Congress Spends Millions! "Does Howdy Doody Have a Wooden Dick"?

Congress and the Senate decided last week to divert the public attention away from important issues.  Congress claims, "Howdy Doody Does have a Wooden Dick"! Senate claims, "We're not sure. Might be Wood! Might not! What's in it for us"? The Speaker of the House pounds his gable proclaims loudly "It's Howdy Doody Time"! "Congress Bitch Boys" say yea!

Dear Fearless Leaders,

Congress and the Senate has been on "Howdy Doody Time" long enough! America  suffers from your incompetence! America suffers from your self-serving decisions! America suffers from your greed and your lust for power! Howdy Doody! Stick it up their asses! "We the people" want "Our Country" back!

Skeetron.

Congress Orders Sheep Quarantine! Utah! Re-Route Sheep to Locations Echo-Charlie 5-6 and Foxtrot-Alpha 4-2!

Congress claims sheep have "Itchy Wool Syndrome" claims rail-yard superintendent. Tuesday, "Men in White" removed the wool from forty sheep. They delivered wool to a military compound in the Arizona desert for analysis. Congress claims should no "Itchy Wool Syndrome" be found a Wool Sweater shall be netted and distributed to Senators as supplies last. Congress claims, " We confiscated the wool from the "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington" campaign therefore each sweater should cost tax payers no more than one million dollars each. Congress claims one hundred million is well within their budget for holiday sweater expenses!" "Congress Bitch Boys" say yea!

Dear Congress,

Please reconsider sweaters. Congress can most likely supply both Senate and Congress with " Holiday Wool Underwear"! At the same cost! Few pair left over for your  "Banker Boys"!  Our Fearless Leaders will then have a reason to scratch their asses as they sellout America! "Congress Bitch Boys" you are NOT! Repeat Not! "We the people"! Stay home! Scratch your asses! "We the people" want "Our Country" back! Skeetron.

Southern Star "We the People" Feel your Pain! "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington"!

Ken, a lumber salesmen and veteran from Alabama wants to help save America. He says, "This country is not what it was. Work hard your entire life! For What? End up with nothing! Ken started as a teenager working in his family owned lumber yard. Loaded trucks by hand till I could hardly stand. He worked his way through college and chose a career selling lumber products to builders and contractors. He became the leading salesmen in the Birmingham area.  Ken claims, " I've been through the ups and downs of the economy since the sixties. Worked hard and steady for forty years. Raised my children. I'm 59. Today, I can barely make my mortgage payment. Lost all my investments for retirement in 2008. I'm screwed! Too damn old! Too damn tired! This new government of ours has backed me to the wall! I'm ready to fight! Hell! I'm ready to die fighting!

Dear Ken,

I feel your pain. All of working America feels your pain. It's their pain!  Remember! Dead soldiers can't fight! Live to free this country! Free its pain!  Live! So our children may live with freedom and liberty. Our battles will succeed! The Jefferson Monument is our sword! The Washington Monument is our anchor!  The "Constitution" is our resolve and God is our commander! Run "Congress Bitch Boys" Run!

Codename: Birmingham 530!

Yes, Lumber Dude Ken you are "We the People"!

Skeetron.

Report Just In! Centreville Sheepdog "Jed" Jailed by Congress!

They took Jed! My sheepdog! Monday night! Centreville resident explains. We were walking down Main Street when a strange sort of step van pulled along side. Before I knew it Jed was gone! Driver of vehicle stated "No Sheep Within Ten Miles of Washington". I pleaded, "Jed is a dog!"  Driver responded, "Not my problem! Call Congress"!

Dear Jed,

Bark! Bark loudly!  Do something!  Drag your ass across the Capitol lawn! Now! Or your doomed!

WARNING!  "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington"  recommends that any dog slightly resembling  sheep are in danger as they approach Washington DC and surrounding areas.

Skeetron.

Thomas Jefferson Giveth! Congress Taketh Away! Claims "Belle of Virginia"!

Susan LaBelle of Scottsville, Virginia offers her eighth generation family farm as a temporary grazing  facility for "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington". She claims her  horse farm is now in foreclosure. Lawyers say she has about a year. She wants to help save this great country from its destructive path.

Susan claims, " Her farm dates back to the American Revolution. Now! Our  Fearless Leaders wants to steal it back!  Susan states, " Too many taxes! Too high! Everywhere taxes!  Congress still wants more! Never enough! Where does it end"?

Dear American Susan LaBelle,

The answer to your question."Where does it end?" It ends when "We the people" make our Fearless Leaders accountable! When "We the people" make our Fearless Leaders represent "We the People"! When "We the people" become the Fearless Leaders! When "We the people" say no! No more! Only then will "We the people" be "By the People"!

Thank you for your generous offer. Yes, we would like to include your facilities in our "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington" operations. We will be in contact. Southern Belle Susan, yes you are "We the people"!

Codename: Virginia 324.

Skeetron.

Sheep Chases Nazi Into Potamac!

Ruth Weinstein claims, "Those murderous Nazis started with just one"! She states, " We the people can stop fascist government if we deal with the problem before it becomes a monster! Knowing what I know now. Would have cut the head off that  "Paper Hanging Son of a Bitch"! Back in the thirties. Someway! Somehow! I was six! Cut the head off the poisonous snake! It can't bite you! Ruth says she came to America in 1947. She was free! Life was good for many years. Ruth claims, " Today. No one is free in America. I get the feeling.  Hitler is back! No work! No money! No food! No freedom! Only misery and despair! The seeds of tyranny"!

Dear Ruth,

I agree America is  becoming a "Government State" as did Germany back in the thirties. I remember freedom. Sure don't see much now a days. Think our fearless leaders had something to do with that? What do you think of this new proposed "National Police Force"?

Ruth replies, "Gestapo"!

Thanks for your pledge of financial support towards the "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington" campaign. Ruth Weinstein you are "We the people"!

Skeetron.

Update! Men In Black! Sheep Headquarters Disappears! Update!

Wednesday night the  headquarters of "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington" vanished into thin air! Even the entrance door disappeared into a newly painted wall! Building maintenance man trembles! "What Office! What Doorway! Who are you people? Then he turns. Begins running!

Dear Men In Black'

Thank you for your patriotism! No matter how misguided! We understand. Just doing your jobs. If our fearless leaders would just do their jobs! "Freedom of Speech" would need not be terrorized!

Dear Frank,

Thank you for the use of your RV! Not sure about the ornaments on the antlers! We do love the America Flag! "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington" is now mobile! Back on Line! Freedom of Speech shall prevail!

Thanks for the cooler of Corona and the  bottle of Captain Morgan!

Skeetron

UPDATE! Sheep Train Robbery! UPDATE!

No! Wasn't the James Gang! An eastbound train was mysteriously delayed in Nevada desert Wednesday. Train reached next stop less one rail car! Conductor claims, "Engines stopped! Men in Black!  Time I came to! Them poor sheep were gone! My rail car was gone! Don't know what happened! Not sure I want to know!"

Dear Conductor,

I agree! Best you don't know. I'll give you a hint! American Sheep terrify our United States Congress. Congress just established a "Sheep Safety Zone" of ten miles around our Capitol. Senate claims sheep are terrorist in wool clothing! Congress banned all American sheep  from Washington two weeks ago! Congress demands, "Sheep go! Or we go! Our Fearless Leaders say yea!

Skeetron.

Congress Fails "Paper Boy Test"!

A fourteen year old paper boy from Up-State New York claims Congress could not make a profit running his paper route! Even if papers were Free! He states, "First, Congress would have to show up for work. Second, Congress would have to work. Third, Congress would have to have enough talent to ride a bike. Fourth, Congress would have to deliver the products they promised. Fifth, Congress could not steal back the products delivered. Last, Congress would have to get off their "Fat Lazy Asses" and do something! Paper Boy gives Congress an "F"!

Dear Paper Boy,

Our Fearless Leaders are no longer motivated or want to build a strong America. Today's  Congress is a parasite feeding upon the sweat equity of  Working America! At whatever the cost! Yes, New York Paper Boy you are "We the people".

Skeetron.

Congress Licks Icing Off "American Cake" As America Starves!

George Divine, a recently unemployed self-employed Baker from Atlanta claims, "Congress exists within a silver spoon world while America struggles on bread and water!" George had to close the doors of his small bakery last month. He states, "Congress Ate the American Cake while Americans worked 24/7 to bake it! George apologizes to our young! We didn't see it coming!  He explains, "I started working at age fourteen. Worked day and night to build a business. Raise my family. I never stopped. Now, I'm 58 with nothing!  End up on the streets!. George states, "Congress licked all the icing off his American Cake!  Now! Congress can lick the icing off my ass! George requests riding the first sheep up the Capitol steps!

Dear George,

I'll supply the saddle! America feels your pain! Small business everywhere across this great country are closing their doors! Why does our Congress Dough Boys want your dough! Because they can!  "We the people" weren't watching! George, Small Business Man, you are "We the people".

Skeetron

Update! Sheep Migration East! Update! Claims Chu Chu Charlie!

A rail yard worker, Charlie Englis of Sacramento, claims he loaded the first rail car for "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington". Charlie states, "I loaded the sheep backwards so their asses faced east towards Washington! That's where the asses are? Right? Skeetron?"

Dear Charlie,

Yes sir! That's how I see it!  I agree!  Congress is Ass Backwards!  Charlie Englis you are "We the People".

Thank you for your services and your creative talents.

Skeetron.

Song Writer Proposes "Bringing in the Sheep" as National Anthem!

Sam, a song writer proposes, "Bringing in the Sheep" as our new National Anthem. He claims, "Working Americans  are the lambs for slaughter! By our Fearless Leaders! For our Fearless Leaders!

Dear Sam,

I believe "Bringing in the Sheep" is an appropriate marching song for "Save America Send a Sheep to Washington. Please work towards a special version for us.

I do  believe we should never change the National Anthem. Maybe add "America the Beautiful" as an addendum. I do  believe in old traditions established by our "For Fathers". They sacrificed all! Fought and died for our freedoms. They believed in their great country! Shame we allowed our fearless leaders to sell out and destroy what they held dear. The Star Spangled Banner belongs to our "For Fathers" forever!

Thanks for your suggestion. Sam you are "We the people".

Skeetron.